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The Girl
My name is Nash and I'm 19 this year. I live in KL, Malaysia. I have many cats. I am extremely funny. I can be quiet at times, but actually I'm easily bored. A chocoholic.
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My diary, my space, my rights. Don't like what you see? Feel free to hit that little X up there. Thanks.
free me
...written on 2004-09-30, @ 10:54 a.m.
I'm at home today cause all the Form 5 students is supposed to rest today.
So yesterday, I accidentally told Atifah all of my problems with my parents and how bad our miscommunication is. How my parents was so over-protective of me to the point of not even letting me go to my friends' house. I told her that my parents will not let me work after SPM cos they're afraid that other 'working people' will affect my thinking. I don't even know what that means!
Atifah is very understanding and she advices me to sit and talk with them next year about my freedom. Yeah, maybe I'll do that cause I NEED my freedom and I'm not a little girl anymore. In fact, they'll be surprised at what I know now. I know a lot more that they think I do. She also said that I must try to prove to them that I can survive in the outside world. She kept saying that the way my parents protect me is very dangerous...and that maybe my parents are scared I will not be able to compete and will be discriminated against if I go to work.
But I think that's not fair to just let me dwell in my own little comfort zone without giving me a chance to taste the life outside. I feel that I should be able to experience life and learn from my mistakes so that I won't do it again. Atifah agreed with me too...and we both thought that that might be the cause of my quiet and shy attitude. When I told her that only this year I was brave and confident enough to make small talks with shopkeepers or strangers, she was a bit shocked. Of course, her mom can related to her and understand her and al least given her some freedom to go to town herself or with her friends.
My parents always think that I'm the vulnerable type of girl who is easily affected by bad influence and bad friends. Who does everything everybody asks her to do without caring whether it's right or wrong. The girl who can easily be fooled and cheated upon. I'm not that kinda girl! You both should have known better. I'm your own child, for god's sake! Your flesh and blood. If you don't trust me, who else?
Please give me a chance, Mum and Dad. Sometimes I felt like I wanna run away, but I still think about the consequences of my actions if I did so, and I won't wanna cause any trouble to anyone. I'm not a little girl anymore and the greatest gift that you could ever give me is my freedom.
I know that my parent's won't be reading this, but I just wanna get this outta my chest. But I hope they can feel it in their hearts. And I wanna thank Atifah for listening to me. I felt relieved after I tell her about it. Thanks again.